The Booger Pickin' Morons

We're not really morons, we just play one on TV. Ok, the TV part is not true. Take a little trip down a scary little road we like to call "the inside of my (our) head". We're like you, only maybe a little weirder. If nothing else, we can promise that you'll never know what might get said here... that's a real-deal promise.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Three Year Old Musings

Alex, the three and a half year old, is pretty funny. He likes to tell me when I drop him at day care to "be nice to your friends and don't hit your teachers!" before I go to school. He also tells me "Good luck on your tests!" even when I don't have a test. But Monday afternoon on the way home was the conversation to beat it all.....

Alex: "Mama, my penis is itchy."

Me: "Did you clean it last night in the bath?"


"You have to keep it clean and take good care of it. You only get one penis in life so you must take care of it, Alex."

"I want a new penis."

"You can't get a new penis. You only have this one."

"But I want a new penis...a big one like Daddy."

OMG! I about died. Thank goodness I a) did not have anything in my mouth, b) was not visible to him, and c) had an empty bladder (I am sure I would have peed on myself). I was hurting from trying to contain the laughter.

"Well, Alex, Daddy's penis was not always as big as it is now."

"It was little once?"

"Yes, honey. Your penis will grow as you grow up. So relax and take care of growing."

I think we have controlled the situation for now. I can't tell you how difficult if was not to bust out into laughter and tears. Hilarious!


  • At 6:08 PM, Blogger Angie Christie said…

    OMG!!!! I laughed out loud! That is priceless!!!!!

  • At 2:40 PM, Blogger Judith Aames said…

    Yes, he is one of a kind. What a crazy boy. I went to the midwife today for my checkup & she asked about the boys. I told her & after she quit laughing told me about a friend's son.

    Said friend has three boys (a special place in heaven for her) and they were in the car. The oldest one said something like "Mom, my penis got big the other night. How do I make that happen again?"

    I busted out laughing again!~ I love my midwife!


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